Thursday, November 29, 2007

Keeping up with the news.

So I stopped in a little neighborhood store near Clearwater Florida, you know, one of those stores that sells beer, lottery tickets, cigarettes, and various odd things on the counter to keep you awake, put you to sleep, or make you more manly. I didn't buy the milk that I had gone in for because the expiration date and today's date were on the wrong side of each other, but I spotted something at the counter that I had never seen before. Two stacks of newspapers. One of them was called "CELLMATES" and the other one was called "BUSTED!" or something like that. I didn't want to, but I had to pick it up to look. Yep, right there in living color, mug shots. It promised "See what the charges are inside!!". I thought THAT was an opportunity that I didn't want to miss. But I did because you couldn't actually look inside because it was carefully stapled shut and there was a yellow warning on the binder that said "$1.00 THIS PUBLICATION COSTS ONE DOLLAR $1.00". I put it down.

When I was able to ratchet my jaw back up to the closed position,
I asked Vandeep behind the counter
"Why?", "Why would anyone buy this newspaper?".
Vandeep shrugged his shoulders and said
"To check up on your friends?".

I laughed, and left without it. The next morning I ran back into the store to buy it, not because I wanted to, but because I HAD to, and Vandeep was still behind the counter, adjusting a new display of a pair of NIKE sneakers that was added to the inventory. One pair, brand new with the box and tags and everything. If you were size 11 and you wanted that type of sneaker and happened to walk into THAT store to buy some very old milk, it was your lucky day. Anyhow, I grabbed the "Cellmates" news, but I couldn't get the other one for comparison because the entire stack had sold out the night before. Really. I confirmed that with Vandeep. At that point I felt disappointed that I was stuck buying the "loser" version. The "other" variety must have had pictures of "hotter" shoplifters and cocaine addicts.


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